TOUGH LOVE

Part 2

By Terry


Pill No. 3

Define that relationship...no time for indecisive people please!!


Just because he/she chats you up on the regular and drops some really sweet innuendos, or always hangs out with you, doesn't mean he/she is your “bae”. You need to know if it's a real relationship, or is it a rebound thing, are you totally being friend-zoned, and are you being considered as a fun time girl/guy? Let all these things be straightened out to thwart unnecessary future heartbreaks. Properly dot your i's and cross your t's so that you don't get your hopes up where there's none to be had. Stop that dangerous assumption today!!

Pill No. 4

Stop trying to change them...you are not their mothers!

No matter how many times you hear this, it's still worth hearing again: never go into a relationship where you feel you are going to change him/her...you know why, because you can't. For the girl, you might just end up being a nag and no one likes a nag or the guy might just find that he is totally being used or probably being pitied (which to yours truly, is the worst). People can change just to get you but eventually their masks fall off and you get to behold the very unsightly and unpalatable true nature they possess. I am not saying people don't change for the people they love but don't assume you can make them do that. People only change if they decide to.


A guy who drinks, smokes, clubs insanely or even hits you isn't just going to change overnight. Have some self respect and walk away if those are qualities you despise.

A girl, who has a chain of boyfriends that you know about, isn't just going to give them all up for you just because you feel you are special. A user is a user.

Remember, cluelessness is different from being adamant.

Pill No. 5

Stop Whining and make it work!!!

After all is said and done, relationships are truly not perfect, they never were and they never will be. The successful ones are made up of two people willing and determined to make it work. Forget all those pictures that depict relationships in the most colourful lights possible. Reality is different... You are going to discover that your partner has all these annoying flaws that make you want to scream your head off at times but then he/she is the one who makes your heart flutter with profound joy at the end of the day. If you find yourselves at that downhill, find a way to boost it up again. Buy her flowers, get him that wonderful wristwatch, cook her a special meal, give him time to ball with his friends, help her wash and blow dry that hair, go on a trip, have a talk to iron it out...


The problem with most relationships these days, even the non-intimate ones is that, people talk more than they care to listen. Listen to the other person, really listen; what are they trying to say with their words and actions.

Whatever you do, try all you possibly can to make it work because a real relationship is not about each one of you bringing a tawdry fifty percent to the drawing board, or an uneven 60:40 but a one hundred and ten percent individually. Goand beyond!!!


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